Vintage Greeting Cards
by:ATTIC SALT

 Minimum Opening order: 24 styles (6 each) $216.00  Reorder $90.00

 Pricing info and to place an order contact  deegeohomedecor@frontier.com

 
Birthday Collection
Over 60 Designs Available!
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09234 Hey There Bad Boy!
Outside: Hey There Bad Boy!

Inside: Did You Just Scoot through Another Year

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09456 A Relaxing Day At The Spa!
Outside: A Relaxing Day At The Spa Sounds Like A Wonderful Way To Celebrate Your Birthday!

Inside: So that's What I'm Going To Do! How Will Your Spend Your Day?

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09567 Happy Birthday To You!
Outside: Happy Birthday To You!

Inside: Moo-sic To Your Ears?

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09123 Something Smells Really Fishy
Outside: Something Smells Really Fishy

Inside: Another 39th, Birthday, Perhaps?

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You might look good for your age!
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08001 Dog Years

Outside: You Might Look Good For Your Age

Inside: But In Dog Years - You'd Be Dead!

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Birthdays are like the numbers
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08003 Bingo Blackout

Outside: Birthdays Are Like The Numbers On A Bingo Card!

Inside: Blackout!

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Did You Ever Wonder What You'd Look Like When You Got Older?
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08004 Wonder No More!

Outside: Did You Ever Wonder What You'd Look Like When You Got Older?

Inside: Wonder No More!

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Golly Gee!
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08008 Golly Gee!

Outside: Golly Gee!

Inside: Are You Like Really, Really Old?

 

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As You Get Older, One Thing To Remember
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08009 Bloat

Outside: As You Get Older, One Thing To Remember

Inside: The Bloat Never Goes Away

 

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I Don't Care What Anybody Says
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08012 Birthdays Suck

Outside: I Don't Care What Anybody Says

Inside: Birthdays Suck!

 

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So You're Having Another Birthday?
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07098 Don't Give A Spit

Outside: So You're Having Another Birthday?

Inside: I Don't Give A Spit!

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I Bought You Some Beautiful Flowers For Your Birthday
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07109 Lost Flowers

Outside: I Bought You Some Beautiful Flowers For Your Birthday

Inside: Now I Can't Remember Where I Put Them! Happy Birthday Anyway!

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Birthday Witch
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07987 Birthday Witch

Outside: Beware!

Inside: The Birthday Witch Waits In The Wings!

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Haffy Birfday
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70107 Haffy Birfday

Outside: Picture Only

Inside: Haffy Birfday

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70119 Bouncing Boobs

Outside: Don't Worry About Your Age

Inside: Worry About Your Boobs Bouncing Off Your Thighs!

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70404 Poor Thing

Outside: Oh You Poor Thing…

Inside: You Just Aren't Aging Very Gracefully, Are You?

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70424 Age Old Age

Outside: Why Does That Person Look Like That? Age. Old Age.

Inside: Happy Birthday!

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70623 Cemetery

Outside: I Can't Seem To Find Your Name Anywhere

Inside: So You Must Be Alive-But Gee You Must Be Old!

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70624 We're Tired

Outside: Happy Birthday To You. Happy Birthday To You.

Inside: That's All - We're Tired.

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70709 Gee, I'm Excited

Outside: Picture Only

Inside: Gee, I'm Excited About Your Birthday.

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70722 Biggest Attraction

Outside: Happy Birthday!

Inside: At Your Age - You're The Biggest Attraction In Town!

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70808 Birthday Cake

Outside: Picture Only

Inside: Okay - So I'm No Martha Stewart!

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70816 Scotch/Water

Outside: Happy Birthday In Honor Of Your Special Day, We Are Here To Serve You Warm Milk And Cookies!!

Inside: Oops, Sorry - Wrong House! The Scotch And Water Cart Will Be Along Shortly!!

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70919 Is That You?

Outside: Is That Really You Standing Next To That Birthday Cake?

Inside: My God, I Thought You'd Be Dead By Now!

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70922 Sexiest Man I Know

Outside: Happy Birthday To The Sexiest Man I Know!!

Inside: Oops, Sorry - Wrong Party! Happy Birthday, Anyway

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71006 Wrinkle

Outside: We're Waiting...So Go Ahead…

Inside: Wrinkle!

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71025 I'm Shocked

Outside: I'm Shocked!

Inside: I had No Idea That You Were Younger Than Me!

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71107 Makeup/Mask

Outside: Let Me Give You A Little Beauty Tip As You Celebrate Another Birthday

Inside: Wear Makeup, Wear A Mask, Or Stay The Hell Inside!!

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98022 Are You Deaf

Outside: I Can't Tell You How Excited I Am About Your Birthday.

Inside: Are You Deaf? I Just Said I Can't Tell You!

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98051 Comp. Clean

Outside: In Honor Of Your Birthday, Your Dentist Has Agreed To Give You A Complimentary Cleaning!

Inside: Just Mail Him Your Teeth-He'll Soak Them Overnight-And Mail Them Back!

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98669 Regression

Outside: Research Has Shown That The Older A Person Gets The More They Seem To Regress Back To Childhood.

Inside: Now Put Your Toys Away And Come Eat Some Birthday Cake!

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99302 Sow Wild Oats

Outside: According To Our Feed Store Calendar You're Celebrating Another Birthday!

Inside: Sow Some Wild Oats!

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99320 Frickin' Cake

Outside: We're Here To Party!

Inside: Where's The Frickin' Cake?

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99326 Firefighter

Outside: Here's A Little Advice As You Celebrate Another Birthday-

Inside: Next Year Don't Light All The Candles!

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99655 Watching the Chicks

Outside: Happy Birthday To A Real Ladies' Man

Inside: Watching The Chicks Go By Just Isn't The Same When You Get Older!

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00101 Holding Teeth

Outside: Good Friends Do Nice Things For Each Other!

Inside: Want Me To Hold Your Teeth While You Blow Out Your Candles?

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00218 I'm Sorry

Outside: Some People Age Gracefully Some People Don't

Inside: I'm Sorry!

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00404 Hearing Aid

Outside: You Don't Have To Listen To People Tease You About Your Age

Inside: Just Turn Off Your Hearing Aid!

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01153 A Ton of Good Wishes

Outside: Happy Birthday!

Inside: A Ton Of Good Wishes!

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01220 More Behind

Outside: Thought I Was A Little Behind

Inside: But I'm More Behind Than I Thought! Happy Belated Wishes

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01228 Kiss This

Outside: Kiss This!

Inside: -And Have A Happy Birthday!

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01397 Here's to Another Birthday

Outside: Picture Only

Inside: Here's To Another Birthday!

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01582 Birthday Aren't So Bad

Outside: Birthdays Aren't So Bad!

Inside: Especially When You Compare Them To Having A Bad Hair Day!

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01919 Little Birdie

Outside: A Little Birdie Told Me You Were Having A Birthday!

Inside: And I Said- "Thanks, Now Get Off My Head!"

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01948 Don't Just Sit There

Outside: Don't Just Sit There!

Inside: Get Off Your Can And Have A Happy Birthday!

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02177 Little Woman

Outside: Picture Only

Inside: Me And The Little Woman Would Like To Wish You A Happy Birthday!

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02587 Baby Judy

Outside: Picture Only

Inside: You Clean Up Real Good! Happy Birthday

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02651 Prune Juice?

Outside: Coffee? Tea?

Inside: Prune Juice? Happy Birthday

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02780 Bloomers

Outside: Don't Get Your Bloomers In A Knot!

Inside: It's Just Another Birthday!

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02840 Wink! Wink!

Outside: You're Not Aging A Bit!

Inside: Wink! Wink! Happy Birthday

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03102 Stopping Traffic

Outside: Oh My! Look At All Those Wrinkles

Inside: Even At Your Age, You Can Still Stop Traffic!

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03103 Light Your Candles

Outside: Picture Only

Inside: Light Your Candles And Your Friends Will Come. Happy Birthday!

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03105 Out of Focus

Outside: You're Looking Good For Your Age!

Inside: But Then Again, You're A Little Out Of Focus!

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O4100 Finer Things In Life

Outside: Ms. Linda, Do You Have Your Hands On His Bum? Ahhh Yes, Yes I Do! And It Feels So Fine!

Inside: On Your Birthday - May You Experience Some Of The Finer Things In Life!

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O4122 Aging Like A Prune

Outside: There's Good News And Bad News As You Celebrate Another Birthday. The Good Neews Is-You're Still Alive. The Bad News Is….

Inside: You're Aging Like A Prune!

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O4133 Spare Tire

Outside: We Thought We'd Found The Perfect Gift For You

Inside: But-At Your Age-You Probably Already Have A Spare Tire!

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05200 Household Staff

Outside: Your Household Staff Is Prepared To Make Your Birthday Special

Inside: Oh Wait-You Don't Have A Staff! You're A Common Schmuck Like The Rest Of Us! Happy Birthday From One Schmuck To Another!

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05201 Lion Cub & Girl

Outside: Why Do People Make Such A Big Deal About Having Birthdays?

Inside: Either You Have 'Em Or You're Dead!

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05203 Mother Nature

Outside: I Would Love To Come Face To Face With Mother Nature & Father Time!

Inside: I Would Beat The Holy Crap Out Of Those Age-Sucking Creeps!

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05205 Ride The Broom

Outside: Are You Getting Ready To Sweep Another Year Under The Rug?

Inside: Or Are You Just Preparing To Take A Little Trip Around The Neighborhood On Your Broom? Either Way-Happy Birthday!

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05206 No Spring Chicken

Outside: Suck In Your Gut, Sweetie!

Inside: You Ain't No Spring Chicken!

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05207 No Rust On You

Outside: Ohhh Baby!

Inside: There Ain't No Rust On You!

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05208 Senile City

Outside: All Aboard For Senile City

Inside: Don't Miss Your Train!

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05210 Don't Care

Outside: I Forgot Your Birthday!

Inside: And I Don't Even Care!

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06100 Wine or Cheese

Outside: You're Aging Like Fine Wine….

Inside: …Or Cheese! Happy Birthday

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06101 The Great Race

Outside: Father Time Wants You To Know That In The Great Race Of Life….

Inside: You're Closer To The Finish Line Than You Are To The Starting Gate! But Happy Birthday Anyway!

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06103 Jeepers Creepers

Outside: Jeepers Creepers!

Inside: You're Still Alive!

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06106 Did I Forget?

Outside: Did I Forget Something?

Inside: Happy Belated Birthday!

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General
Over 40 Designs Available!
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09901 Keep Your Sunny Side Up!
Outside:

Inside: Keep Your Sunny Side Up!

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Let's Eat! How About A Nap?
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08007 Snowbirds

Outside: Let's Eat! How About A Nap? Lets Go Fishing Or A Nice Ride! How About A Game Of Cards?

Inside: Snowbirds Tackle So Many Tough Decisions Every Day!

 

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07210 Many Thanks

Outside: Picture Only

Inside: Many Thanks!

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07432 Power To The Elderly

Outside: Power To The Elderly!

Inside: That Would Be You!

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07543 Re-Tire

Outside: When Your Tread's Worn Thin & Your Traction's Worn Slick

Inside: It's Time To Retire! Enjoy!

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07765 Flying Fart

Outside: How'd She Do That? How'd She Get That Fart To Fly?

Inside: Speaking Of Farts--How The Hell Are You?

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07876 Anti-Aging Cream

Outside: With A Sagging Butt--Drooping Boobs--And Underarms That Wave Good-Bye Before I Do--

Inside: Do You Really Think That I Give A Rip About A New And Improved Anti-Aging Cream?

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70122 Adopt My Children

Outside: I Need A Rest. I Need A Vacation

Inside: I Need Someone To Adopt My Children

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70224 Middle Age Spread

Outside: Picture Only

Inside: Isn't That Middle Age Spread A Bitch!

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70321 Bubble Butt

Outside: No Matter How Much I Diet - No Matter How Much I Exercise-

Inside: I Can Never Get Rid Of My Bubble Butt!

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70417 Cook Out

Outside: Picture Only

Inside: The Woman In Your Neighborhood Just Love It When You Cook Out!

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70504 Patiently Waiting

Outside: Patiently Waiting

Inside: Please Write

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70711 Friend/Hairstylist

Outside: To My Friend And Hairstylist

Inside: Where The Hell Did You Go To School?

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71209 Hey Big Boy

Outside: Hey Big Boy…

Inside: Wanna Play A Round?

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98033 Good Grief Roy

Outside: Good Grief, Roy, Do You Have To Fart All The Time?

Inside: What's The Deal? Did God Just Have One Mold When He Made The Guys?

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98049 You Don't Cook

Outside: It's Okay That You Don't Cook!

Inside: Nobody Likes What You Fix Anyway!

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98098 Live Long

Outside: You Only Live Once

Inside: So Live Long!

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98613 Grandchildren

Outside: It Just Doesn't Make Sense-Our Grandchildren Are Such Perfect Little Angels…

Inside: And Their Parents Were Such Little Turds!

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98638 Neat Pig

Outside: Look At This Neat Pig That I Got For My Husband!

Inside: Pretty Good Trade, Eh?

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99050 Yoo Hoo Friend

Outside: Yoo Hoo - Have You Been Hiding From Me Friend?

Inside: I've Been Missing You For A Long Time!!

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99712 Friend/Barber

Outside: To My Friend And Barber

Inside: Where The Hell Did You Go To School?

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00333 Our Husbands

Outside: Young Girls Today Have Everything We Had At Their Age - Looks, Poise, Personality, Charm…

Inside: …Our Husbands!

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00606 Back in Diapers

Outside: Picture Only

Inside: Don't Laugh…It Won't Be Long And You'll Be Back In Diapers Too!

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01054 Toot Your Own Horn

Outside: I Know You Don't Like To Toot Your Own Horn

Inside: But It's Your Potty And You Can Toot If You Want To!

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01129 Never Give Up

Outside: Picture Only

Inside: Never Give Up!

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01409 Hot Dog

Outside: Don't Be A Little Wienie

Inside: You're The Big Hot Dog Today!

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02214 Has Been

Outside: Don't Worry, Honey - You're Not A 'Has Been'…

Inside: …Till You Can't Remember Where You Has Been!

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03107 Exercise Videos

Outside: I Love Those Exercise Videos!

Inside: I Can Sit And Watch Them For Hours!

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03108 Easier Cleaning

Outside: Check With Your Dentist -

Inside: I Think There's An Easier Way To Clean Your Teeth!

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03109 Gossip

Outside: Gossip Makes Little People Smaller

Inside: My Place Or Yours, Little One?

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03111 If I Had a Hammer

Outside: If I Had A Hammer…

Inside: I Wouldn't Need A Husband!

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O4111 Furniture Disease

Outside: Many Older People Suffer From The Dreaded Furniture Disease

Inside: Their Chests Have Fallen Into Their Drawers!

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05214 Low Carb Diet

Outside: Dieting Just Doesn't Work For Me! I Tried That Low Carb Diet Once-

Inside: Worst Meal I Ever Had!

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05215 Let Hair Down

Outside: Regardless Of Where It Is -

Inside: Sometimes You Just Need To Let Your Hair Down!

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06104 God's Chosen Few

Outside: Bald Men Are God's Chosen Few!

Inside: He's Given Them A Face And Space For Another Face!

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06105 Good Days / Bad Days

Outside: I Have Good Days & Bad Days! Some Days I Can't Remember My Name.

Inside: Then Other Days I Can't Remember My Name!

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Get Well/Inspirational
Over 40 Designs Available!
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03113 Chicken Soup

Outside: Chicken Soup Is Good For What Ails You!

Inside: Would You Like That With Or Without Feathers? Get Better Soon

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Wishing Well
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07654 Wishing You Well

Outside: Picture Only

Inside: Wishing You Well!

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70904 Heart is Heavy

Outside: Please Don't Be Sick….

Inside: …Cause My Heart Is Heavy When You're Sick!

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98027 Praying For You

Outside: I’m Praying For You!

Inside: I Hope It Helps!

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01100 Quietly and Prayerfully

Outside: Picture Only

Inside: Quietly-And Prayerfully-Thinking Of You

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05216 Sick In Bed

Outside: When You're Sick Enough To Stay In Bed -

Inside: You're Sick Enough To Get A Card! Feel Better Soon

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Sympathy
Over 40 Designs Available!
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03115 Gone from Sight

Outside: Gone From Your Sight

Inside: But Never From Your Heart With Deepest Sympathy

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09345 Beyond Our Sight!
Outside:

Inside: Beyond Our Sight, Their Journey Continues! With Deepest Sympathy

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Additional Card Categories Available:

                                WEDDING

                                ANNIVERSARY

                                SPECIAL OCCASION

                                HOLIDAY

                                PATRIOTIC

 

Go to www.ATTICSALTGREETINGS.COM to see entire offering by this Fantastic Company       

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Contact  deegeohomedecor@frontier.com  for Prices and Ordering information